nothing much ..nothing less ..

OY dis is happening...? All i wan is a happy life..normal life.. life that i dream of.. but y now its is far from what i imagine when i was kid...huh...

For some reason...i feel so so tired trying to explain wat i am for those who still dint noe me...yes i'm hard to be understand but y..y did even oredy known me for so long but still dint noe me how exactly i am...the reason i'm avoiding all of it is that bcoz i dun wan to make such small thing bcome really big...its not important but i do feel really sad when the same person hurt me many2 time ... Yes i find that money is really important for me..well who doesnt..? But the thing that i wan to clearify here is..the money thet i important only the money from my own earning...i dint ask for ur money.. i dint say money is really2 that important than others but now..money i have to put on top of my list...bcoz...without money..how i wan to care bout others thing..how i wan to care bout my family..my self...how? Can u tell me that..?

I noe its nonsense..i noe i say money is my 1st love..but y u dun even think..if i ordy say money is my 1st love..i sure already go n put myself such low grade juz to pursue money..so think it back..my money is my 1st love..because i earn it..but if my familybis ij need of me..my family is the very 1st love on top of money...money sure is important in our life but some might get lost on this matter but i'm nt 1 of those... I still remember n noe who i am...

good thing?

Too many thing happen lately..haiz..will there gonna b a gud day for me one day ...juz hope after all of dis gonna b a gud day...hope for better things to happen..crossing finger..god..plz bless ur child...amen...

left behind..???

i wanted to have a carrier ..but where n when will i get it...its like now getting to late for me to noe which path should i really go...i no..i'm alone in this world...all my frens...i juz dunno wat to do anymore...i juz cant really let it get to me...i juz wanted to have frens that i can count on but sometimes i feel like there's no one there for me...there's only a few but how long it can stand...now i feel like i have changed again..may b i'm the one that keep on changing...sometimes i juz feel like running from all of this...haiz...now yes i still have closed frens...but i feel like we are getting apart...i really miss the old us...where we can meet...can talk juz about anything...all of them..i do miss them..but seen all the thing that ever happen..not that i dint forget bout that but i juz cant forget..i do forgive them but juz still got something that bother me so much till it make me only wan to be alone, dreaming all day..
Enuf with my frens..its my working place now...haiz..how i wish i can work at a place wer can give me a steady feeling even its mean i need to work hard...but i dun mind...i wan to work hard but all i wan n ask for is to work in environment which i can feel safe not scare all the time...n most important is to be the real me...oh god...juz help guide ur child here...amen...

not only that...in my family..i do feel sumtimes juz too locked inside a cage...haiz...i juz wish i can fly from this cage..but still can return without being locked back...i noe to took care of my self..yes sumtimes i'm so un-aware of my life but its part of learning right...am i ask too much..???haiz..hope after this all gonna get better soon...bless me n all ur child oh god...amen...